Sometimes You Feel Like a….Hazelnut

Although I pray to be able to clearly hear God’s guidance and wisdom, I often feel like I have a block and just do not receive direction clearly. Often times in my prayers I will say something along the lines of, “Lord you need to make it obvious because I am really dense.”

One such instance that I knew was a sign of confirmation from God occurred when Adaline was a baby. I had spent nights awake, unable to sleep wracked with anxiety over a medical decision for her. The day before her scheduled appointment, the pediatricians office called and said they had to cancel the appointment. Prayer answered. Sign received. Thank you for making it obvious Lord!

Jump forward a few years and I am halfway through my pregnancy with our newest addition. Those who were around for all three of my pregnancies (or even just one) know I am terrible at picking names for our children. I find it so difficult and frankly, do not like the process one bit. Not only do I need to find a name that I like the sound of, but I want it to have a good, solid meaning.

So, here I go again, praying to God. “Could you help me pick a name? Something classic, yet cute, that can be shortened and has a nice meaning. Also, please make her name obvious, because again Lord, I am dense. I know I should be praying for world peace, but this is very important.” Ok. I didn’t actually pray that last part.

A few weeks later when I was saying nighttime prayers with our oldest, Adaline, I was going through my usual ending to our more specific prayer. “Lord, I thank you for the continued health of our family. I pray you continue to watch over and protect Daddy, Mommy, Adaline, Charlie and baby girl in my belly.” As I said that last part, I almost said, unwittingly, out loud, “Evelyn”. Whoa! I immediately was like, “That you Lord?”

Step into my excitement for a moment. Adaline fell asleep, I jumped on my phone, eager to see what the meaning of Evelyn was after receiving this CLEAR sign that this was baby girls name! I type it into Duck Duck Go, anticipation rising. Evelyn an English name meaning… “hazelnut”. Um. What Lord? Hazelnut? Not cool. An alternative meaning, “island”. Welp. I took that off my non existent potential names list.

Fast forward another few months of scrolling through list after list of potential names. Asking friends and family to share name suggestions and looking through family history to pull out any names we could use. As my due date drew nearer, I thought I may just let this girl name herself when she was older. All the while, Evelyn, kept coming back to me and was the only name that stuck. But hazelnut. I could not get past that meaning.

Now, can I switch gears for a moment and share something that can be seen as taboo? At least in the parenting world. I was very much on the fence about having a third child. My husband was completely clear on his desire to add another child to our family. When it came up in discussion I was the one who would list reasons why it may not be a great idea. Money. Marital stress. Another c-section. Medical bills. More years of sleep deprivation.

Obviously through prayer, God laid it on my heart that there was room for one more. Everything is a season. We are in the trenches right now with young kids, but occasionally I get hints of what is to come as Charlie and Adaline are getting slightly older and more independent. I also received some wonderful advice that hit home for me. A friend said to me, “Picture your Thanksgiving table in 20 years. How many children do you want coming home to sit around that table? Does it seem complete with two? Do not focus on the stress of the next few years when making this decision.” Three children it is.

Why do I share this little aside? After continuing to be drawn back to the name Evelyn, I did additional searching on multiple websites looking into the history and meaning behind her name. I found an alternate meaning to her name.

“Wished for / desired child”. Well. That’s more like it! I felt such gratitude and comfort when I found this meaning. As if God set aside this name for me as a confirmation that we had made the right decision by growing our family by one more. Regardless of the craziness that ensues, we can do it and she is the perfect addition to our circus. Thanks for making it obvious Lord!

Evie girl is very much a desired child. I look forward with excitement to who she will become and the love and joy she will bring to our family.

In what ways has God shown you a sign or answered a prayer in an obvious way? I’d love to hear your stories in the comments.

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