Prior to having kids, you look at other parents and you may scoff. You roll your eyes at the disarrayed hair and makeup, the sweat pants. You say to yourself, “I will NEVER be one of THOSE parents”. I like so many women before me, had a list of all the things I would never do. Well, I’m here to tell ya you can just throw that list right out the window.
For your enjoyment, here are five things I said I would never do and now do with zero second thoughts.
1. Sweat pants and crocs as appropriate attire for running errands. You betcha! In fact, when you squeeze into your “nice” pair of yoga pants, you will feel quite fancy. Put on a pair of jeans and you will feel like you are dressed to go to Cinderella’s ball!
2. Lay in bed unable to fall asleep while singing, “Johnny, Johnny, Yes Pappa” or any other random children’s song at nauseam. In fact, you will constantly have children’s songs running through your head. Not only this, but you will find you actually start to have favorite children’s YouTube nursery rhyme channels. My personal favorite is Dave and Ava.
3. Hide your child’s favorite book after reading it for the 17th time so they have to pick another one. In reality, you don’t even need the book though, because you can recite “The Pout, Pout Fish” from cover to cover by memory.
4. Use your shirt, your pant leg, the back of your hand, anything but a tissue to wipe your child’s nose, mouth, hands and whatever else is necessary… because why are the tissues and wipes always out of reach!!??
Become a pro at scooping your child up mid toddle to sniff their butt for a poop check. Speaking of poop, you will obsess about it. Does my baby poop often enough? Is it supposed to be that color? Does my baby poop too much? What about this texture?
Alright mommas, share with me all the “I swore I would NEVER” things you do ( I have more, but didn’t want to write a novel)!
Dirty Toes and Mommy Prose 
Isn’t it funny how so many things change once we are actually a mom? My list could probably go on and on.
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Oh my gosh, I probably could’ve made this a Top 20 list!
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Yes. 🤦 I do all those things. Being used to wipe boogies on. Sneezed in the face. But gotta love them.
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I do all those things. Even being used to wipe boogies on. Sneezed on face. Still got to love them.
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Don’t you just love when they come over and you think you are about to get a sweet hug… and they wipe a booger on your leg?!
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I live in yoga pants!! These are so true.
I remember when I was pregnant, I would read what felt like the longest baby development book every morning. When I got to the part about TV I swore I would never let my little man watch it before age 2. Ha! That went out the window fast.
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Same here with the screens. I made it to about 11 months and then I just need her to sit and watch some TV in the mornings so I can make breakfast and get ready for work. What are you gonna do?
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This made me chuckle because my husband randomly started wearing Crocs after becoming a parent. He even wore them out on a date night thinking I wouldn’t notice.
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Um, OF COURSE you would notice! That is so funny he thought he could get away with it!
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Thank you for writing that1
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